"I shall take no tea."

That's the dignified way to say "No, thank you" when the hostess offers you more tea, and you'd really like some, however you're torn, because some Patriots threw tea into the river in a strict rebellion to the King of England and now the Loyalists are at odds with the Patriots and since your father is a Patriot, you feel that taking more tea would be in strict rebellion to your father, but the girls across the table are Loyalists and they're looking at you strangely, because you're not taking more tea and....

Sorry. Poor Felicity the American Girl. That particular tea party much have been pure fictional torture for her.

But what's not pure fictional torture, was the non-fiction high tea party that I attended on Saturday. My adopted momma won aforementioned high tea party at a church auction a few months ago. As an adopted daughter in their family, I was cordially invited to this social event of the late spring season.

And here's Lil' Miss. She dressed up in her tea party best. Her momma even curled her hair and painted her nails.

My sisters from another mister. Love these girls like real sissies. Sisters. Not wimps.

My beautiful Pseudo Momma and Pseudo Grandma.

Pinkies out, girls! We are sophisticated and refined.

My favorite course - Tea Sandwiches.

These weren't your regular PB&Js, people. I didn't even want to eat them; they were so pretty.

I love us. Thank you, Momma Roosma, for loving me as one of your own.

One thing I learned: You are never too old for a tea party.

And there is no limit on the number of tea sandwiches a lady is supposed to take and consume.