Pretty Nanny Seeks Yellow Jewelry

Nanny Em has been busy.

Very busy.

Almost too busy.

It was approximately two weeks ago that I had this startling revelation. I was in the teacher's work room at school enjoying a friendly conversation about the life of a nanny. It was as I was speaking, that I suddenly realized that if anyone else were to be listening in on our conversation, they would perhaps have a very different point of view on the subject. And me as a person. A strong, confident, person whose moral compass points true north.

Imagine for a minute that you are a fly on the wall...

Colleague 1: "How many nights have you been in your own bed, Nanny?"

Nanny: "Only two in the past 3 1/2 weeks."

Colleague 2: "Wow! I bet you make pretty good money though, right?"

Nanny: "Yes, I do. So it's worth it."

Colleague 1: "Do you let them just pay you, or do you have a set amount?"

Nanny: "Oh, I have rates. Of course, it depends on the time of week. Weekends are busier than weekdays, so I tend to charge more on the weekend."

Colleague 2: "That's great!"

Nanny: "Yes, it is. My back is really starting to bother me, though. I'm not used to jumping from bed to bed so frequently."

It was at this point in the conversation, that it dawned on me. And I began to pray that there wasn't a parent nearby picking up bits and pieces of this innocent conversation. Because it would be hard to convince a fly on the wall that we were indeed talking about the life of a nanny and not the life of one of "these" girls:


Be honest. You were thinking it, too. If only I looked that good in a skimpy leotard and pleather boots. Actually, the boots I could probably pull off. But that's it. I'm sure they would give the same effect when paired with yoga pants.

Now, fast forward two weeks to yesterday.

I couldn't take it anymore. My back was killing me. A slow, painful death.

So I called the chiropractor. And glory be, they had an opening at 4:30.

So there I was. Explaining to Doctor my situation. Not wanting to be mistaken as one of "those girls", the conversation went something like this:

"Well you see Doctor, I work as a NANNY for local families. When parents need a vacation, they also need a NANNY to come and stay with their beloveds. That's where I come in. I'm a NANNY, you see. I stay with kids when their parents leave. Because I'm a NANNY."

Ramble much? Good grief. I think he got the picture, though. And then proceeded to tell the receptionist to start screening calls from the alleged, "Nanny".

Anywaaaaay, after my spine was back where it's supposed to be, I ventured on over to the mall. Wanna guess what store?


Holy crow. She told me they were out of small bags, but honestly. Nothing screams "LOOK WHERE I SHOPPED TODAY!!!" like a shopping bag the size of my upper torso.

Then I waltzed down to Target where I scored these:


*sigh* I love you berry much. I am wearing these pieces of heaven today, which means there is no turning back since I'm confident the insides will be filled with my blood by noon. It's the price I must pay for cute shoes.

And now for my Want ad:

Single, white, wedding singer seeks yellow jewelry for Cousin's upcoming nuptials. Specifics include a bracelet and earrings. No necklace is needed. If you are able to assist Ghetto Barbie in anyway, please let me know ASAP. Hopefully my faithful readers will be more help than EVERY store in the mall. xoxo

Ghetto Barbie out...