Deep Thoughts from Second Graders

Do you remember the Saturday Night Live comedy sketches Deep Thoughts with Jack Handy? Hilarious. No seriously. Like pee-in-your-pants funny.

"Sometimes I just feel like curling up on the floor in front of the fireplace, and just rolling around the room, like a tumbleweed, and not even caring if I knock things over, or break them. And if people get mad, maybe because it's their house or something, you can just shake your head and go, "What happened?"

or

"I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then when somebody comes up act like they just woke up and go, 'What was THAT?!'"

or

"I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle Cave Man the best. We called him Uncle Cave Man because he lived in a cave and because sometimes he'd eat one of us. Later on we found out he was a bear."

Oh man. Those were the good ol' days. Now, SNL just, to put it bluntly, sucks. It's not funny. There are no Deep Thoughts. There are no Cheerleaders. Marty Culp and Bobbi Mohan-Culp, the HILARIOUS music teachers are gone. Why even watch.

Lucky for me, I have my little cherubs here in second grade with their own deep thoughts.

"Even if you're sick, you should still try and go to church, Miss K." True.

Student A: “Maybe God decided He didn’t like dinosaurs so he destroyed them.”
Student B: “No; the Bible says that ‘God saw all He had made and said that it was very good’.” Again, true.

"Miss K, you sound like my Wii Fit instructor." True. I did sound like a Wii Fit instructor as I pumped up my class for their first math timed test. And it was worth it. They all passed.

"There is nothing better than the smell of turkey soup." And once again, so true.

"You guys are going to lose, because we have Jesus on our team." This is the trash talk that resulted from me pitting Team Israel against Team Judah in a friendly game of Trash Ball. Team Judah, stemming from the line of King David. I must admit, however, that I was THEEEE-RILLED with this comment, because it was an oh-so excellent display of this particular student's Biblical comprehension. Kudos to his teacher.

And that completes Episode 1 of Deep Thoughts by Second Graders.

Tune in next time for more proverbs from the little people.

Enjoy your rainy weekend! Or for you mid-westerners, the snow!